I Quit!

I’m playing defense as we enter 2011.  Each year my wife–she is very disciplined and competent–makes a list of resolutions for the New Year.  To me it looks daunting, but she manages to follow through–something I have struggled with my entire life.  Months ago I was reading a wonderful little book by Geri and Pete Scazzero on quitting.  Yes, I know, all quitting is suspect.  But, they suggest that quitting can be good for your life.  What would happen if you quit living for everyone’s approval?  Or, if you quit trying to live someone else’s life rather than your own?  They suggest that quitting may be more important than adding something new to your life.  That is an idea that I can embrace. In 2011 I plan to quit.

As it turns out, it’s not easy.  Trying quitting over-functioning when you have thought most of your life that the world will fall apart if you stop.  Or, try quitting living for the approval of other people, when you know how painful it is to be rejected or pushed away.  The truth is we are doing these things because we think they will make our lives better.  They make our lives work.  That’s the lie we believe, of course.  The problem is our strategies are not working.  This is why we are angry, resentful, and why we struggle with an inexplicable grief.  We need to quit.  Quit pretending everything is okay when it is not.  Quit worrying so much about what other people may think or say about us.  Quit approval seeking.  Quit lying to ourselves and others about how we are doing. I know there are tons of books in the self-help section at the bookstore.  But, if those books worked there would not be so many of them and we would all be doing better.

I’ve re-learned that the cure can only come through the gospel.  We can only be our authentic, honest, human selves through a deep reception of the grace of God.  It is His unconditional love that alone can cure us.  Why is this the case? Because we are not okay.  Things really are broken.  We really do have shame and fear.  We really do feel alone and scared.  (Am I really letting a cat out of the bag here?  We all know this.)  It takes a great and unconditional love to bring us out of hiding and give us the freedom to be ourselves, by the grace of God, and enable us to connect to other people even though doing so subjects us to the danger of being hurt.

So welcome to another year.  What needs to stop in your life?  What do you need to quit?  Here’s to another year in God’s grace with less striving, avoiding, blaming, lying, and hiding.

One response to this post.

  1. Posted by Sandy on August 11, 2018 at 9:31 pm

    So…how’s the quitting going? 🙂
    P.S. I do NOT follow through with my resolutions but at least I have a great start to each new year!!


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